making a subject that is sooo interesting and exciting to learn into one that is so abhorable. Exams do just that.

"you guys are so cute, always together."

Sometimes when I hear that I am not sure if I should be glad or be scared. Last night I was talking to a friend of mine, the first thing he asked me was "how are you guys doing." It's funny only a year ago I was so against the idea of someone being such an integral part of my life, and now we are practically indistinguishable.

Possession. Complete possession. 

Made me smile throughout the whole 6 minutes :)

All of a sudden, I miss home.

But then I thought about it again, if I was in Hong Kong right now, I probably would miss the Bay Area. It's so strange; I have always identified myself as a Hong Kong-er, but for some reason I feel like an outsider whenever I go back. I am not in touch with the latest news or the latest hits in Hong Kong and I have no idea what's new. I go back just to see myself following the same old routine: drink, club, shop, then drink more, club more and shop more. It's like, Hong Kong is a past that keeps repeating itself. It's stagnant. It's not going anywhere. 

Then what about The Bay? It is definitely in touch with my present. I explored new places and had my fair share of fun. But I can't call it home, obviously because I don't have a history with this place and my family is not here.

So, I guess my conclusion is, home is more than an identification that tells people where your family is or where you were born. It's more than just your childhood memory. It is also a place where you can imagine yourself in, right now. And as for now, I can't see myself living a life in Hong Kong. 

But you know, I still miss my friends and family of course :(

ughhhh I'm gonna blame it on finals. making me all sentimental and shit.

One of part of myself that I dread, is the jealous me. The more I control it the more I feel it. And I hate the feeling of not being able to do anything about it. All I can do is just glance at your computer screen and get angry at how you are able to hang that sweet smile on your face every time you see that little window pops up, just like you did when you first met me. I don't want to act like a bitch every time and give you that attitude, but sorry it is my only way to cope with my feelings.

Anyhow, finals coming up, and I am majorly fucked...feel like I didn't learn shit this semester :( but hey, summer  is around the corner, and hell yeah I am looking forward to it (kinda).

It's been ages since the last time I blogged...when was that? four years ago? I still remember all the things I wrote  and I am amazed, to be honest, at how emotions just flowed out from my fingertips with such ease. It seems like I went from one extreme to the other in these four years: from being unable to control my feelings to controlling them a bit too well. May be this is a way to reach a balance.

Let's hope I am able to keep this up

and ....thanks chocho for motivating me <3 I love how we are still doing this together four years ago and four years after :)